Grounding Your Energy - to Calm Emotions and Anxiety
We have all been there: so anxious or overwhelmed that all logic has disintegrated. So emotional that tears or rage seems to flow without stopping. Obsessively refreshing a page on social media hoping for an update to get that “fix” so maybe this all-consuming feeling will stop.
Emotions are an essential part of life. They create bonds with others, help our minds and bodies to process the events in our lives, and push us along our journeys.
It’s natural for these emotions to ebb and flow like the ocean’s tides. However, sometimes they can get out of control and feel more like a tsunami than like a normal “high tide”.
In these moments, it is important to ground one’s energy in order to calm down enough and break that emotional “spiral” that can keep someone from living their life. Learning energetic grounding techniques can help us get through a scary presentation at work, help us to nurse a broken heart, or even help us get through a stressful family holiday dinner.
Q: Why should I ground my emotions? With something like a breakup, sometimes it feels like fixating on the person will help somehow. Like if you think long enough or hard enough, you’ll discover something that will crack this code, and find the answer to make everything okay again. As much as it stings, pouring your energy into a situation where you don’t have the control isn’t going to help. It’s just going to deplete you. And your attempt to be Sherlock Holmes isn’t going to change anything for the other person, either. You’ll get more benefit by grounding your energy and reserving your efforts on what YOU need to do in your daily life.
Q: Well… my feelings are VALID though. Oh, babe, ABSOLUTELY they are. But valid feelings can still take over your life, if you let them! And why would you let a bad feeling ruin your day, week, or month?? Feelings are not facts!
Okay, with that out of the way… let’s get into some grounding techniques:
The Five Senses - One of the top recommended techniques to get yourself from a panic attack is to start naming or noticing things you can sense with your five senses. A common rule of thumb is naming Five things you can see, 4 things you can hear, 3 things you can touch, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste. You can repeat this for however long you need or play “I Spy” with things you can see until you feel calmer.
Finding Your Body - Rubbing or patting your arms or legs, hugging yourself, and creating sensations of physical touch for your mind to focus on somatically, effectively grounds your mind back into your body and into the present moment when anxiety or emotion has your mind disconnected from your body. Physical touch is one of the most effective somatic grounding tools in moments of distress.
Writing it Down - There is a reason we associate journals with healing and reflecting. Sometimes writing things down when we are anxious, overwhelmed, or emotional is the fastest way to get “back to the facts” . Writing a list can be an effective tool for anxiety and overwhelm, writing “just the facts” can be a way out of a grief or sadness spiral, writing a stream of consciousness or a letter to the person you are mad or sad at is also a way to ground yourself and channel all the pent up emotion from swirling around INSIDE your body, to outside your body and get yourself back closer to neutral.
Box Breathing - One of the best breathing techniques available to calm anxiety and clear one’s head is called “Box Breathing”. To do this, you count to 4 as you inhale, hold your breath for another count of 4, exhale for 4 (or longer!), and hold your breath “on empty” for another count of 4. Counting to 4 and slowing the breath physiologically gets your body and mind out of the panic state, moving you back toward calm.
“Go Touch Some Grass”- Being in nature is a great way to change gears, move your body, and get in touch with some calm energy. When weather permits, the simple act of walking outside, putting your feet in some grass or sand, touching a tree, and aligning your energetic vibration with nature always helps. If weather interferes with this, pop open a window and take some deep breaths of fresh air. Even that will help.
Dance it Out - Sometimes, the best way to get out of your head is to get into your body! Putting on some music and dancing, or going on a run is a great way to shake anger or anxiety loose, and channel it outside of your body. If you have pent up energy from your emotions, this is the best way to channel it out!
“Force Quit” the Spiral and Change Gears - When a webpage or computer freezes, often times we need to “Ctrl - Alt - Delete” and Force Quit either the page or program in order to try the computer function again. Think of emotional overwhelm as a frozen webpage. Change the subject, change the channel and “force quit” whatever is making you freeze. If you’re fixated on social media, pick up a book or go for a walk. If you’re angry, stop the rage and take a shower or clean something. Sometimes the simple act of “changing gears” or switching activities can change your mindset and emotions completely.
“Phone a Friend” - Getting an additional perspective is often a great way to shift your current narrative about a situation. Venting will also do wonders for getting a situation off your chest, and oftentimes connecting with a friend is a great way to change your current energetic and emotional state. Of course, make sure that your friend is a willing participant before launching into venting and make sure to reciprocate when it is your friend’s turn!
Meditation - While when you’re actively spinning out is not the best time to start, a meditation practice is an amazing preventative tool to improve your calm and focus and keep better control of one’s emotions. There are a library’s worth of free guided meditations on YouTube for you to try. If you don’t like someone telling you what to do, you can play a frequency or gentle music and try to clear your mind, focus on your breath, and see how long you can stay in the present moment.
Try a combination of a few of these techniques and see how they help you, not only in the moment of heightened emotions, but also overall as a general trend. The more we can independently manage our own emotions and pull ourselves out of these “spirals”, the more empowered we feel and less these episodes will happen overall.
Let us know what works best for you in the comments below, and if you want personal advice from Betty on managing your emotions, book a Life-Coaching session today.
